-
Sticky Post: Where Do I Start Reading?
I’ve just found your work and there’s a lot of it, where do I start? Welcome to my website! First off, my name is Johannes (Yo-Han-Ehz) T. Evans. I’m a gay, disabled, transgender man originally from Chepstow in the South of Wales, and I now live in Bradford in West Yorkshire, though for several years before now I lived in Galway, in the west of the Irish Republic. I’ve been writing for years, and you might actually already be familiar with my work – I’ve been on Tumblr under various URLs (before using my own name, JohannesTEvans, I was at…
-
Cold Comfort
Queer fiction. A mob boss takes in a rival’s hostage, and tries to keep him from suicide. Photo by cottonbro studio via Pexels. 14k, M/M, rated E for equally explicit sex and violence. Set in 1920s New Jersey. Nasty and violent. Alvis Hunter, boss of a significant crime operation, steals a captive out from under a rival—Naham, a rabbi’s son who immediately attempts to kill himself. In the aftermath, Alvis tries to keep him alive; Naham tries to find something worth living for. Some philosophy and introspection in this one along the way of the rape recovery. Warnings for rape and sexual…
Category: M/M, Kink: Knifeplay, Setting: 1920s, Setting: New Jersey, Setting: USA, Theme: Antisemitism, Theme: Class & Caste Differences, Theme: Crime & Criminals, Theme: Crises of Faith & Belief, Theme: Faith & Religion, Theme: Homophobia, Theme: Immigrants & Immigration, Theme: Incarceration & Imprisonment, Theme: Intersex People & Intersex Bodies, Theme: Jewish Faith & Identity, Theme: Jewish Religion & Mythology, Theme: Mental Illness, Theme: Organised Crime & The Mob, Theme: Power Struggles, Theme: Queer Community, Theme: Servants & Service, Theme: Sex & Sexuality, Theme: Sexual Abuse & Rape, Theme: Trauma & Trauma Recovery, Theme: Violence & Killing, World: Magic Beholden -
Little Devils: Chapter Six
Fantasy Serial. Velma meets two angels in Burnham-on-Sea. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Previous Chapter Directory of Chapters Next Chapter The man that met her in the car park in Burnham-on-Sea was one of the biggest men she’d ever seen in her life. He was huge, hulking, and his bulk was made all the apparently heavier by the large great coat he wore, which she knew by sight was an antique — and…
-
Little Devils: Chapter Five
Fantasy Serial. Velma tries to get a cat into a bag. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Previous Chapter Directory of Chapters Next Chapter The drive down to Falmouth was a long one. She’d packed an overnight bag fit for three days, wanting to ensure she was allowing for the maximum she could expect, and then if she really had to stay for any longer, she could just pick up some of the…
-
Little Devils: Chapter Four
Fantasy Serial. Velma captures some demons, then visits Hamish MacKinnon. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Previous Chapter Directory of Chapters Next Chapter The Atermorpha family was fairly wide-ranging, with all sorts of colours and subtleties, but the main shape remained the same: Velma thought they looked rather like caterpillars, but with harder, chitinous shells instead of softer skins. The segmentation of their bodies was obvious on sight, the many rounded pieces…
-
Is the Homophobia Worth a New Hobby?
Rolling the dice on homophobia in nerd spaces. Originally published in Prism & Pen. I went to a board-game evening last night with my boyfriend Lewis, who’s nonbinary and uses he/they pronouns. Frequently, people assume they’re cisgender, especially because he’s fat and has a gorgeous, thick beard. I’m a gay trans man, I only use he/him pronouns, and I’m at a point in my transition now where I almost never get clocked as transgender even by other trans people — a lot of the time other trans people don’t even realise I’m trans too unless I say it explicitly or take my shirt…
-
Little Devils: Chapter Three
Fantasy serial. Velma goes home and calls Aunt Ginchiyo. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Previous Chapter Directory of Chapters Next Chapter Velma had grown up in Glasgow, but when her father’s shop had gone under, at about the same time her mother had been made redundant, they’d moved down south to Nottingham, to be closer to Aunt Ginchiyo in London, as much as all the other reasons. The bulk of her…
-
Barbie Isn’t Anti-Men — It’s Anti-Toxicity
Patriarchy does damage to us all, and Barbie (2023, dir. Greta Gerwig) clearly depicts that. Via IMDb. We went to see Greta Gerwig’s Barbie at the weekend and I was honestly surprised by how much I engaged with it — it’s a fun, entertaining flick, but where it really took me by surprise is in the three-dimensionality and nuance it applied to the male-female divide in the film, and especially the care it extends to its male characters. As a gay man and especially as a trans one, I’m often left a little cold when it comes to some films’ explorations of gender…
-
Little Devils: Chapter Two
Fantasy serial. Velma Kuroda first enters MacKinnon Antiques. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Previous Chapter Directory of Chapters Next Chapter Velma stood sceptically with her hands in the pockets of her orange denim jacket, leaning back on her heels. It looked suspiciously nice for a place that was going to take so much as a haunted tinderbox off her hand, let alone a demon-possessed piece of wood bigger than she was.…
-
Little Devils: Chapter One
Fantasy Serial. A specialist in magical antiques investigates a haunting. Velma Kuroda, a young specialist in magical and enchanted antiques, is taken under the wing of Hamish MacKinnon, a master enchanter and centuries-old immortal — a crotchety old man possessed by a horde of little demons. Directory of Chapters Next Chapter Prologue It was a bright and sunny day when Hamish woke up, but because it was January, the light was somehow anaemic, neutered. It came through the window in a neat square, directly upon his pillow, and he groaned quietly, reaching up and pressing the heels of his hands against his…
-
Yentl: A Trans Man Studying Talmud is Distracted by Gay Thoughts
Yentl (1983, dir. Barbra Streisand) and Yentl the Yeshiva Boy by Isaac Bashevis Singer. Any of us would be distracted from study by Mandy Patinkin. Via IMDb. It’s a sad thing, hearing cisgender people talk about Yentl — especially the short story — and think they understand it, that they’re getting everything from it, while at the same time, they can’t conceive that transgender people even exist. It’s a strangely joyful short story to read as a trans man, as sad and complex as it is, and the film has a similar bittersweet warmth to it. “Yentl — you have the soul of a man.” “So why was I…
-
Close Reading: A Deep Dive into the Process
An in-depth guide into applying analysis to a piece of text and extrapolating meaning. A close reading is what we call an in-depth analysis of a piece of text, which might be in the case of fiction a short story, or for novels and novellas might be a portion or an extract from the text. A “text” can refer to virtually anything — this piece is going to focus on reading and interpreting written fiction, particularly short stories and extracts from novels, but a “text” can be anything: a photograph or a painting, an essay or an article, a television show or…
-
Public Performance
A vampire shows off his toy for a club. 1k, cis M/trans M. A vampire fucks his trans boyfriend in a crowded nightclub as people dance below them. Featuring some chem sex with the drugging effects of a vampire belt, public sex, fingering and vaginal sex, overstimulation, and implications of a fevered gangbang in the aftermath. It’s busy in the bar, and Lars has Laurence leaning back against his chest, his legs spread wide, Lars’ lips against the side of his neck. Laurence’s eyes have been closed for some time, not wanting to sit with the flash and burst of the…
-
Writing Advice: Crafting Richer Erotica
Adding depth and complexity to your sex scenes. From my Tumblr! Photo by Ketut Subiyanto via Pexels. Anonymous asked: Your smut is always so good, I hope it’s okay to ask for advice, but I’ve been struggling with writing smut in that my sex scenes always end up so short — I don’t want to just pad them out for the sake of it, but when I read them back they always seem to be over so quickly and it’s bothering me, but I can’t figure out where I’m going wrong. do you have any tips for keeping up longer sex scenes? I responded:…
-
The Relief of a Queer Audience as a Fruity Stand-Up Comic
Explaining one’s existence takes up time. Originally published in Prism & Pen. I’m a stand-up comedian. Last week, I did some comedy at a queer-run, queer-centred open mic — suddenly, a twelve-minute set fit into six, because I was in a room full of queer people who knew exactly what I was talking about. I didn’t have to take time to explain what bears, twinks, and otters are; I didn’t have to make sure everyone had a working understanding of what Grindr is; I could make puns and little quips that because of the sheer cultural gap, a cis straight audience just wouldn’t…
-
The Wicker Man (1973, dir. Robin Hardy)’s Spit in the Face of Cops and Colonialism
Exploring The Wicker Man’s themes of authority and control on its 50th anniversary. Still from The Wicker Man (1973, dir. Robin Hardy), via FILMGRAB. The Wicker Man (1973, dir. Robin Hardy) is a stalwart classic of the horror genre, and particularly the folk horror subgenre. It was re-released in 4K for its 50th anniversary on the Summer Solstice last month, and after all these years it’s as impactful as it ever was. The Wicker Man opens with the arrival of Sergeant Neil Howie, a police officer from the mainland of Scotland, on Summerisle, a strange island in the Hebrides. After…
-
Sickbed Trade
One sailor tends to another in his sickbed. Just a little M/M piece with some love and intimacy. 500w. The air is cold and wet and dank, the chill sinking in through the ship’s hull from the rolling rainstorm outside, but Hamish is still sweating buckets, feeling as though there’s a burn under his skin, his blood feeling as though it’s bubbling in his veins. He tosses and turns, constantly shifting in his bunk — he’s been shifting and fidgeting for hours, unable to relax and really sleep, and the surgeon has been in and out of the infirmary to check on him,…
-
As a Trans Man, Why Do Doctors Always Want to Get Me Pregnant?
I’m so tired of fielding questions about my “lost” fertility Photo by Pixabay via Pexels. I can’t tell you how often I am asked this question by any medical professional. I mention that I’m on testosterone, have been on T for years. This script goes forward even with my endocrinologists. DOCTOR, with a pinched look on their face: And what about your fertility? ME: What about my fertility? DOCTOR: Are you aware that testosterone can make you infertile? ME: I am, it’s one of the many benefits. I still want a hysterectomy though. DOCTOR, with an even more pinched look on…
-
A Grindr Hook-Up
Sex and intimacy on demand. Photo by Ketut Subiyanto via Pexels. “Hi.” “Hi.” “Find the place okay?” “Yeah.” “Come upstairs. This way.” It’s always funny, the first moment a hook-up crosses the threshold into my bedroom, the way he looks around, takes in the place — the flags and posters, the LEGO I have on display, my computer set-up, my calendar. We all do it when we enter someone’s space, make a measure of them based on the evidence provided. I sit back on the bed, lean back on my hands. He kicks off his shoes, maybe drops his jacket, but before he undresses…
-
Questions You Wish You Could Ask A Gay Transgender Man
A tongue-in-cheek take on cisgender people’s frequently asked questions. the pride progress flag by daniel quasar Are you a man or a woman? I’m a man. But it’s confusing. How do I know if you’re really a man or a woman? Great question. So when I said, “I’m a man,” that can generally be interpreted to mean, “I’m a man”. But have you always been a man? Nope! In English, normally we refer to “children” and “boys” and “girls”, and later we refer to them as “adults” and “men” and “women”. That’s not what I meant! Are you really a man…
-
The Secretary
Short story. A young woman goes to collect her inheritance. 4.1k, rated M. Content warnings for loss of a loved one and non-graphic references to sexual assault. Sarah had never even known the man, so when the letter had come, it had been a surprise. She hadn’t even been sad at first — she’d felt somewhat guilty about it, but her initial response had been irritation, anger. Her father had never bothered to meet her, and yet here he was, dying and leaving her paperwork to fill out, all this shit to go through, all this stuff to do. It’s not fair,…
Category: Gen, Setting: 1960s, Theme: Anxiety Disorders, Theme: Books & Literature, Theme: Grief & Loss, Theme: Homophobia, Theme: Men Who Love Men | Homosexuality, Theme: PTSD & C-PTSD, Theme: Retirement, Theme: Sailors & Sailing, Theme: Secretaries & Personal Assistants, Theme: Sexual Abuse & Rape, Theme: Trauma & Trauma Recovery, Theme: Veterans & Retired Soldiers, Theme: World War II, Theme: Writing, World: Magic Beholden -
Passing Privilege: Through My Eyes, as a Trans Man Who Passes
Second puberty and the waves we send through the spaces around us. Originally published in Prism & Pen in June, 2023. I came out as trans at about fifteen or sixteen, changed my name, and I’ve lived as a man since. As a young man doing my A-Levels, going to university, and working afterwards, I was out as a man, using he/him pronouns, using my actual name — And I passed okay. To people who had no idea what a trans man looked like, it was pretty easy to give people a funny look and say, “I’m a man,” in a…
-
Paper Houses
Fantasy/romance short. A train conductor begins a relationship with a regular passenger. 7k, rated M, M/M. Some sweet autistic 4 autistic love and affection with a build to the relationship and some fantastical elements on the side. Adapted from a TweetFic. CWs for past domestic abuse, physical abuse, scars, and implied ableism. Roy sees the same man on the train on his commute pretty much every weekday he’s working. He always sits at a table — he likes to book a seat in advance no matter what, and Roy knows he’s not scared of insisting a seat is his when he has…
Kink: Size Difference, Theme: Ableism, Theme: Anxiety Disorders, Theme: Autism & ADHD, Theme: Banter & Flirtation, Theme: Child Abuse & Neglect, Theme: Debt & Money Troubles, Theme: Family Dynamics, Theme: Ghosts & Necromancy, Theme: Intimacy, Theme: Models & Figurines & Dioramas, Theme: Power Dynamics & Imbalances, Theme: Power Struggles, Theme: PTSD & C-PTSD, Theme: Scars & Permanent Injuries, Theme: Secretaries & Personal Assistants, Theme: Trains & Railways, Theme: Trauma & Trauma Recovery, World: Magic Beholden -
Movie Review: Lawn Dogs (1997, dir. John Duigan)
What an interesting fucking film. This review also on Letterboxd. One of the end stills of the film, via IMDb. So like… This is a film from the perspective of a ten-year-old girl who grows up emotionally neglected and isolated in a picture-perfect gated community — having survived a heart transplant, she is in many ways morbid and isolated from other children her age, and this is really driven home by the complete dearth of same-age children in her community but for a little boy who serves as a counterbalance for her presence on screen. Where Devon (Mischa Barton) is quiet and contemplative, intrigued…